Pastor

Because our emotions are often a source of so much trouble for us, we can see them as a nuisance that just gets in the way of efficient and effective living. But what we fail to realize is how our emotions are a unique part of how we as human beings bear the image of the invisible God in our fleshly existence.

The blurring of sexual boundaries and mores in modern life has led to a heightened level of sexual attention towards women today that leaves many women feeling uncomfortable. Learning how to handle this unsolicited attention is vital for a woman who wants to honor God with her sexuality.

Because of our natural self-serving bent, sexuality is often perverted into some grotesque distortion of what God intended it to be. But that distortion is not confined merely to relationships outside of marriage. Sexuality within marriage can also fall far short of God's original design for meaningful intimacy and mutual pleasure.

All too often, people who have been abused often feel like their voices go unheard in the church. But that should not be true of the family of God. A healthy church can teach its members what it means to be equipped as a listening community by encouraging conversations that matter about the difficult struggles of abuse and the hope for meaningful healing from the damage of abuse.

Many who struggle with the wounds from past abusive relationships are often plagued by current anxiety as to whether or not they will ever be normal again. Much of that answer depends on what one defines as "normal." Helping an abuse victim see that if normal means no longer experiencing the pain of a broken world, then that "normal" isn't possible. But if it means becoming a more whole person in spite of the brokenness in this life, then there is hope for a "new normal."

Abuse of power is common among leaders. No where it that abuse of power more destructive than when it's a trusted spiritual leader who is wielding power to abuse and control others. That's why it's imperative that pastors and spiritual leaders have safe guards in place to prevent them from abusing the power that God has entrusted to them.

Unfortunately, spiritual abuse happens more often than we might think in Christian organizations. Addressing the issue is both difficult and delicate. While many choose to avoid it by leaving the church, others lash out against leadership in destructive ways. There is a better way to address spiritual abuse when it occurs that we can learn.

Spiritual leaders have an incredible power to influence others under their care for good. But there are some who exploit their positions of power to control others for their own purposes. This is one of the most heinous forms of betrayal because it is done in the name of God.

Because of past sexual abuse, many victims question whether they will ever be able to freely enjoy their sexuality without shame or feeling dirty. Admittedly, while sexual intimacy will often be a struggle within marriage, abuse can't destroy their potential for delighting in true intimacy that releases a couple to more fully enjoy their sexuality together.

There is no excuse for abuse. And yet, many women suffer in silence at the hands of abusive men. In order for the silence to be broken, the abused woman must step through the shame and reach out to another trusted woman, a woman's shelter, a counselor, her doctor or a wise pastor who can begin to help her break free from the destructive cycle of abuse that is being used against her. Getting help means breaking the silence and telling someone else your story.

Abused women often don't describe their situations as abusive because their husbands tell them that they love them. The excuse is that "things just got out of hand" and "it will never happen again." The reality is that when women begin to tell their stories to others, they are often shocked to hear that they are being abused. Abuse is always abuse no matter what the excuse.

Abuse of all kinds is rampant today. For far too long society at large and the church especially has been willing to settle for looking at life superficially. But the current conversations about abuse seem to be more honest and less superficial. There is a genuine desire to meet people where they're struggling and not to ignore the pain and shame of past or present abuse.

While conflict is a part of every normal relationship, including marriage, abuse has no place in a loving relationship. The commitment to love at all times will not allow either partner to step over the line from normal conflict into abusiveness.

Words can be either a wonderful source of encouragement and blessing or they can be a devastating source of pain, shame, and blame. The old saying that "words will never hurt me" just isn't true. How we use our words with one another can be life giving or abusive.

Most people tend to minimize the effects of emotional abuse because they don't seem to be as obvious as those caused by physical or sexual abuse. However, just because the damage is emotional and internal doesn't mean that it's any less painful or destructive. In fact, it's often even more destructive for that very same reason.

For many who have been victimized by abuse at the hands of others, they have felt powerless, defined by their abuse. But while abuse has devastating impact, it doesn't have the power to destroy the core of who we are as people made in God's image. Victims have the power to respond with courage, grace, and forgiveness as they make choices to deal with the abuse and not allow it to define or destroy them.

History is not only an important topic that we study in school, but also when it comes to understanding our personal stories as well. We look back and remember our past not to change it but to understand the influence that it has on how we live in the present. Without understanding our past, we're doomed to repeat the same patterns in the presen

Abuse is a serious issue for many people. For those who have been victimized by abuse and for those who love them, it cannot be anything but serious. But others can sometimes feel that it is talked about too much. Can too much be made of abuse, and if so, when?

One of the last effects of abuse on it's victims is that they often allow the abuse to define them. They retreat into living as abuse victims rather than seeing themselves as people who had this horrible thing done to them and for which they are not responsible.

Women struggle with addictions just as much a men do. But the kinds of addictions that women battle with are uniquely different than the struggles men face. At the core, what fuels the intensity of addictive struggles for a woman is when she and others define her beauty exclusively in terms of external appearances while ignoring the inner beauty of her feminine soul.