5 Ways Pastors Can Strengthen Youth Ministry

1. Know their names.

Listen, you and I both know that if Gertrude is one of your top givers, you aren’t going to keep calling her Betty. You don’t forget the names of your deacons. If you’ve got a visitor coming, you make every effort to know their name. But somehow, when Chad decides it’d be a good idea to grind the handrail down the stairs, he’s “hey kid!”

But that’s honestly a silly example. You’re probably going to know Chad’s name because you’ve had to talk about him in your trustee meeting when you went over the insurance policy. The ones you are missing are the kids who just look like an extension of their parents. Jessica becomes Joe’s daughter. Mark is Sally’s boy.

Do you think Mark is going to view you as his pastor? Or will you be his mom’s pastor? And just when do you think that switchover is going to take place, Dr. Frankenstein? Learn names. Attend events. Have conversations. Let students know they are part of the flock already.

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2. Champion your student ministers.

Student ministry has a ridiculously high turnover rate, and it’s not hard to understand why. They often have enormous expectations while serving a group that many churches can treat as peripheral. Not to mention that it can feel like you’re the weirdo who has chosen to go into the keep a severed leg alive field.

And that can lead to comments even from the pulpit that really undercut what you’re trying to do. These aren’t helpful:

• “I’m sure thankful he keeps our kids entertained.”
• “He gets to have all the fun, while I do the work.”
• “If you can survive youth ministry, you can survive anything.”
• “He only works on Wednesday nights.”

Then there are the subtle jabs like introducing him as “youth guy (gal).” Or even “not a real pastor.” Or, “you’ll understand when you’re doing real ministry.” Here are some better options for you:

• I’m grateful for the way Pastor X opens God’s Word for our students every week
• One of the healthiest parts of our church is our student ministry, and I’m thankful for the leaders investing there.
• Some of the most significant discipleship happening in our church is happening on Wednesday nights.

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3. Integrate students into the life of the church.

I’m going to show my cards here. I’ve always thought “Youth Sunday” was a little weird. It’s that one glorious morning when all the teenagers (or maybe a tenth of the teens that come on Wednesday) emerge from their cocoon and try to put on the whole service. They’ll cover announcements, play a few songs, read Scripture, have a testimony, or so, and maybe one brave soul will share some Scripture. Then next Sunday rolls around, and we put everybody back where we found them in the hope that they’ve learned a few things that they can put into practice next year.

I need to rephrase that. I don’t think it’s youth Sunday, that’s actually weird. I think the fact that we need one is a little strange.

If teenagers were actually part of the church, then they’d be doing some of these things within the ordinary life of the church. Not as a prop. Nor as something that’s cute to hear the twelve-year-old read Scripture. But to actually give them meaningful places to serve. Let them work alongside adults in a type of apprenticeship. Put them on mission teams. Give them some leadership roles. Invite them into prayer gatherings.

If turning eighteen suddenly feels like joining a completely different church, something has gone wrong long before graduation.

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4. Set expectations that invite growth.

I minored in youth ministry in college. One of my professors liked to say that teenagers would go to the level that you set for them. I took it to heart. I’ll tell you from experience that I’ve found it to be true. While it’s true that some kids don’t rise to the occasion, those are few and far between. I’ve seen so many teens go to the level I set for them.

We can mistakenly assume that teens can’t handle serious theology, long conversations, difficult passages, or meaningful responsibility. So, we give them spiritual chicken nuggets and then wonder why they aren’t developing any kind of appetite for God’s Word. We complain that their attention span is almost entirely gone. And that you couldn’t even think about doing a Bible study any longer than 5 minutes.

Can I gently suggest that maybe the problem isn’t with the kids? Maybe they aren’t being challenged. I’m not saying that you should be a drill sergeant. I’m saying, believe in students. If the senior pastor treats teenagers like disciples who are capable of real growth, that expectation begins to shape the whole ministry. Let them wrestle with hard texts. Expect them to serve and to show up when they’ve committed to something. Give them responsibilities where there will be consequences for the whole ministry if they don’t follow through.

Believe in kids, and they’ll surprise you. But can I tell you a little secret? It’s not just the kids you’re believing in—it’s really the work of the Holy Spirit. If those teens know Jesus, they have the same Holy Spirit you do. Why would we sell short God’s ability to work?

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5. Refuse to join the generational pile-on.

Here are some quotes from adults sharing their opinions about teenagers:

• “Many are so pampered nowadays that they’ve forgotten there is such a thing as walking.”
• “Students are spoiled brats who are ungrateful, disorderly, and often dirty and immoral.”
• “Spoiled, sloppy, lazy, teenagers today need to know that they are expected to pay their way!”
• “Young people are bent on destroying customs and institutions.”
• “A generation, numbering in the millions, has gone so far in decay that it acts without thought of social responsibility”
• “They think they know everything, and are always quite sure about it.”

Pampered. Spoiled. Ungrateful. Immoral. Never had it so good and yet complain so much. That kind of describes those Gen Z and Gen Alpha kids of today, doesn’t it?

What if I told you that first quote was from 1951. The second from 1969. Then we’ve got a couple from the 1970’s. The next-to-last one might shock you. It was from 1936. That was describing what is now known as the Greatest Generation. Oh, and that last one is Aristotle in the 4^th century BC.

What all this tells us is that dogging on teenagers has been a thing for quite a few centuries. Whatever generation you fit in, there was an older generation that spoke poorly of you. And that means, as a pastor, if you want to get a quick “Amen!” here is one way to do it. There is something almost irresistible about standing in front of a room full of adults and confirming their suspicion that the kids are a mess. They’re too soft. Too entitled. Too distracted. Too whatever. You’ll get some laughs if you say it with a dash of humor. And you might even get a few people thanking you afterward for “finally saying it.” But before you take the easy win, remember who else is sitting in the room.

But that applause is going to cost you something. Every cheap shot teaches teens how you and the church really see them. It tells them that before they’ve even spoken, you’ve already placed them in a category. This is most certainly not what is meant by raising the bar for them. It’s placing it on the ground. And you’ve just given the adult in your congregation permission to do the same thing.

If you want to strengthen your youth ministry, don’t play this silly game. Ephesians 4:29 applies to how we talk about teens, too. “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs…”

In conclusion, it doesn’t matter if you keep up “leg day” if you’ve already cut off the leg. Hiring somebody to keep it alive or strengthen it for some unknown future is missing the point. The bigger issue is that you’ve got a severed limb. Fix that first. Strengthen your youth ministry by treating teenagers like what they already are: a living, growing, necessary part of the body God has called you to shepherd.

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